Book Review: I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You, by Ally Carter

 

The students and teachers at the Gallagher Academy for Exceptional Young Women pretend that the school is an exclusive private school in order to hide the fact that it’s a government-funded institution, intended to train future spies. Cammie Morgan, the headmistress’ daughter, enjoys every part of this charade until one night, on a practice mission, she meets a boy from the town who assumes that she is just as normal as he is. Cammie thinks he’s cute. Her friends think he’s a enemy agent. And her mother can’t possibly be allowed to find out about their burgeoning relationship.

Looooooong title. Short book. I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You is a quick, fun story set in a fabulously unusual school. I loved all the little details – from the lesson topics, to the mechanisms that disguise the building’s real purpose when outsiders arrive. The mission scenes are exciting and funny and I really looked forward to the dramatic final operation. I also loved Cammie’s friends – the mix of characters in the group is a bit of a YA cliche, but it works in whimsical stories like this, and they’re all intelligent, hard-working, determined young women. I think Liz, the clumsy genius, is my favourite, but I suspect that my opinion is subject to change!

Cammie has a lot to juggle: secrets, feelings, and spy-schoolwork, and at times I felt like that the book jumped potentially interesting scenes. An example from the start of the book – Cammie skips over telling us about the homecoming of her school ‘sisters’ and why they stayed up all night, and I thought that could have been such a good scene. I also wanted more scenes featuring Cammie and her mum together, but I expect that their relationship is explored in more detail in the rest of the series. I didn’t find Cammie’s voice completely engaging, and as a result, I felt slightly distanced from her, but hopefully that will also improve.

I would recommend I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You to fans of boarding school stories, with a caveat to bear in mind – it’s intended for the younger end of the teen market. There are a few serious moments, but for the most part, it’s a gentle and light-hearted read.